Are We an LGBT-Affirming Parish?

Editor’s Preface: This is the first of two essays on parish ministry and sexuality. The second essay will appear tomorrow. The two authors ultimately land in different places in practical and theological terms. However, their perspectives are both so nuanced that blithe labels like “liberal” and “conservative” are not helpful; the instinct to place them in such categories reflects perhaps the lingering political sensibilities of an earlier generation. Instead, let us read, mark, and digest. It is likely that our readers will find things to disagree with and affirm in both essays, and the discomfort of this may be frustrating. But we believe that such conversations are not just worthwhile but necessary as we seek faithfulness to the gospel.

I received a communication from a seminarian in a progressive evangelical church interested in the Episcopal Church. This person wanted to know, before a potential visit, if our parish is “LGBTQIA+ affirming.” My initial response was that, although it may sound clichéd, all are welcome. I said that I’d be interested to hear what LGBTQIA+-affirming means to him. His response: “Practically speaking, being LGBTQIA+-affirming generally means that queer folks are accepted and welcome to serve in any capacity, up to the highest levels of leadership. Affirming denominations and churches usually do not consider homosexuality, or ‘homosexual acts,’ to be sinful. This position (Side A) was, understandably, placed in contrast to Side B, which holds to a ‘traditional’ sexual ethic (between one man and one woman).”

This became an opportunity for me to formulate as thoughtful a response as I could, which follows.

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Allow me to try to express an understanding of your questions (even though I would prefer to do so in person). As you know, writing does not allow for immediate feedback and clarification, and can lack helpful nuance, limiting what we seek to express).

At any rate, if one has to “take sides,” Church of the Ascension & Saint Agnes is on Side A. However, speaking of nuance, these categories require much more nuance which could perhaps happily lead to viewing these questions less in terms of sides.

For us, as for much of the Christian tradition over the centuries, the divine life, although it takes hold of who we are in all that we are, is beyond the categories of which you speak. Hence the words of Saint Paul (Gal. 3:26-28):

“In Christ Jesus you are all children of God through faith. As many of you as were baptized into Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ. There is no longer Jew or Greek, there is no longer slave or free, there is no longer male and female; for all of you are one in Christ Jesus.” One could add, “no longer straight nor gay, no longer transgender or…”

This declaration of Saint Paul is not simply aspirational. It is a given, it is a divine fait accompli, into and according to which we are invited to live. Indeed, “Your life is hidden with Christ in God” (Col. 3:3).

Because we believe and try to live this, these categories are, in one sense, a non-issue. They do not apply to the depth at which we meet one another as Sisters and Brothers (even though, again, we bring our whole selves to these encounters). All are truly welcome, and all are truly supported in how they are personally “working out their salvation” (Phil. 2:12). And because we believe and try to live this, and because of the depth at which we meet one another as sisters and brothers , we have members from across the philosophical spectrum. Everyone here is affirming of individual persons, knowing that we are called to want what is best for one another to grow in faith, hope, and love, knowing also that our individual journeys in the public square will look different.

Regarding the specific ideological underpinnings of what appears to be the predominant secular political LGBTQIA+-affirming agenda, we have an array of perspectives among our members. This makes sense because these are philosophical questions that do not find a clear, easy answer in faith and theology. There are some who wholeheartedly agree with and are supportive of the predominant LGBTQIA+-affirming ideology and there are some who are uncomfortable with and have reservations about the predominant LGBTQIA+-affirming ideology. The latter, however, are no less supportive of the spiritual life of those with whom they do not align in terms of thinking on this issue. They are very affirming of individual persons, their fellow parishioners, and of each one’s responsibility to live the Christian life as he or she discerns best. In fact, one could argue that the presence of such members who are differently affirming (who do not have, by the way, a hidden agenda to force their perspective on the parish) witnesses to a special magnanimity of heart. Indeed, one does not have to agree with someone to love and to affirm them. And loving someone with whom I do not see eye-to-eye requires particular generosity of heart.

What I am perhaps essentially saying is that unity, oneness, is the fruit of love, not of ideological alignment. If this were not true, church as we know it would not be possible, church would only be a place of the like-minded (nowadays, we sometimes see this — at both ends of the political spectrum). We are not like-minded, humanly speaking. Saint Paul does, of course, say, that we must

be of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility regard others as better than yourselves. Let each of you look not to your own interests, but to the interests of others. Let the same mind be in you that was in Christ Jesus. (Phil. 2:2-5)

I would argue that this “like-mindedness” is not regarding social issues. It is regarding one another as sisters and brothers, beyond human categories, as Jesus sees us (“the same mind that is in Christ Jesus”) and about laying down our lives for one another as such. We are like-hearted, joined by the Holy Spirit as siblings in God.

And so, here at Ascension & St. Agnes’ Church, we journey together with these philosophical tensions, knowing that we are already one in Christ. We are not militant. Individual members may feel called to “militant” activity, in which they are affirmed. We do not fly a “pride” flag. We are not unanimously in agreement with the tenets that this flag seems to presume. We need not be, because our life is deeper than this. Even if we were unanimously in agreement with the tenets that the “pride” flag seems to presume, we would not fly it. The cross is our flag, which is more inclusive than any other flag.

I hope that this is helpful. I close with one of our five parish “values,” which may give a little more perspective.

We value the church as a community that welcomes all people, where viewpoint diversity is considered a blessing. Jesus’ “kingdom is not of this world” (John 18:36). The course of action for Christians in the political sphere, therefore, is not always obvious and may lead to different political perspectives among parishioners. We are certainly not removed from the world, as we are called to love “in truth and in action” (1 John 3:18). Because we may have different understandings of how to “act justly” (Micah 6:8), as a church we choose to minister primarily in our immediate community and we pray that each parishioner go forth, formed by our common faith and according to the dictates of individual conscience, to make the world a better place.